Arranged date that led to a marriage....

... in 1998

You didn't read it wrong, we met in 1998 and we were introduced by colleagues. It was a very Korean way of matchmaking but there was no Korean involved.

I was working at a European bank as a derivatives structurer. What is it? Well, it's a job at a bank and let's stop here as I don't know if I can ever explain it clearly anyway. Hyuk was a junior lawyer at an English law firm. I worked with Ali, an Irish lady from Belfast with a fantastic sense of humour and Hyuk worked with Glenn, an Englishman with a passion for football. These are the two people who changed the course of our lives completely.

Glenn took albums from his wedding in Belfast to the office to share with colleagues who couldn't make it. Hyuk spotted me (oh yes, I know what you are going to say but I wasn't that crappy looking at one point in my life) and showed interest. Anyway, didn't know what they talked about at the pantry and the next thing we knew, we were introduced at the farewell party of another colleague of mine. It was a junk trip out to Lamma Island and that means we were stuck with the same crowd of people for the whole evening.

I drank quite a bit and not sure if I threw up at all but Hyuk was a real gentleman and he sent me home that night. I woke up without a scratch or a black eye and we had coffee the next day and the day after and again and again.

My grandparents were introduced to each other too. However, by the time they met for the first time, it was already too late for either of them to run away. I think my grandmother saw the face of my grandfather for the first time ever in their bedroom. At the tender age of 14, my grandmother was a child bride.

My parents met on my father's first job and it was their choice to get married after dating for a while. My father was a pretty handsome man and my mother a stylish beauty. Halaboji and Halmoni also met each other at the swimming pool of their school (Halaboji went back to give talks when Halmoni was a student ), they dated for a while and decided to get married.

The marriages of my grandparents and my parents lasted all the way till the very last day of the life of the other half and there wasn't a new spouse at all. Halaboji and Halmoni's one is still going strong. The pressure that came with the change of circumstances, may it be war or moving to a totally foreign country, didn't do anything to hurt the relationship. In fact, the relationship got stronger.

So. all the debate about whether arranged marriage or marriage of choice works better? In my opinion, it's all about the couples. Didn't our family history showed it all?